Need sound advice on Algerian man

[Lady_Cannondale]

assalamualaikum to all...

first of all, lemme intro myself. im C and im a muslim lady from south east asia. im very new to this forum, very new to any knowledge of algeria, except for knowing tt zinadine zidane is an algerian. but for the past 1 week, my knowledge has tripled, considering that it was zero before, thru reading info on the net and alhamdullilah, after stumbling upon this site.

why the sudden interest, u may ask? wat else if not for a certain algerian man who has completely besotted me, and he has proposed marriage.

my questions: is it common for algerian man to propose marriage even when we've not known each other for long(less than 2mths and we've only met twice)? how would i know if he's serious tho he's been bugging me to tell my family abt him soon? he's also getting his visa processed so that he can meet my family. is it the algerian mentality to be so accommodative to professional working women like myself?

any help or a glimpse to the algerian mentality, attitude or anything would be greatly appreciated.

many thanks...

[The_Ghost_of_Time_Bomb-]

well i wouldnt recommend rushing into any marriage, regardless or religion or nationality, you're obviously not 100% sure so wait a bit, if he turlly loves you he will understand!

[Lady_Cannondale]

hi ghost...thanks for the reply.

u r, of coz, very right abt not rushing into something as important as committing oneself to another person.

the thing is...im taking a gamble. i dare admit that there' no love involve here...well at least not yet. but for sure there's a strong mutual attraction and i really starting to care abt him...and im sure we'll fall in love eventually.

wat im concerned with is his family's acceptance to me. from the postings i read here, family is paramount in an algerian life....and im afraid that his mother esp wont be able to accept me as a DIL, tho we're gonna stay so far away from them, i juz thot it'd be nice if everybody can get along cordially.

and for the sake of discussion, wat does an algerian man expect from his wife? are they known to be utterly chauvinistic (like not letting the wife goes out to work?)

[The_Ghost_of_Time_Bomb-]

well when it comes to algerian men it kinda varies, quite alot do become traditional when they marry and sort of go back to old school ways, and will expect you to cover up and be at home with the kids, but not all, me for instance, i am at home now looking after the baby while my woman is at work, and i do not force her to wear hijab. although i was born n raised in UK so maybe my mentality is different.

this is why im saying wait and get to know him better, you may not want some nasty shocks later!

[HeWhoDaresWins]

Lady C,

You have known this guy for 2 months and only met twice and yet you are seriously considering marrying him!!
and You are asking if he is or Algerian man are old fashioned!!.
It seems to me you are more "old fashioned" than most, or you have other reasons for considering this proposal. Anyway only you know.

As for "what are Algerian men like" in a country that is 5 times the size of France!! let me answer by asking YOU.. "what are women like in South East Asia".
See, i guess you need book to answer me. So would we!.

Just take it that men are men, the good, the bad and the ugly.

I suggest though that you go back to the drawing board and review for yourself, WHY oh WHY you wanna marry someone you met twice in your life!!!

[HOUDA-K]

~ all ~

I seriously think that when anyone considers marriage, you must pose the question to yourself as to just what kind of husband you want, what his qualities should be in order to establish an Islamic and peaceful household, and how you will know who he really is.

You don’t say what is attracting you to this man and I hope it’s not his beauty nor his charm.

My dear sister, no~one knows his heart and intentions, no~ one knows whether he will turn sour or more pleasing for you, or whether you are suitable for each other, except for Allah {SWT}.

I cannot provide a better conclusion than saying that you please do NOT rush into marriage with this brother or any brother and ultimately put your trust in Allah.

May Allah help us in our sincere efforts in following His commandments and the way of His beloved servant, and provide us with spouses whom He loves.

[Lady_Cannondale]

i hear ur concern brother...and yes, i do hv my reasons why i think he might be the one for me...

and like i said earlier, i know that u cant stereotype ppl, but im sure it helps to know the kinda environment and background a person comes from in order to 'predict' his actions and reactions to things.

likewise, i can generally tell u abt south east asian women's mentality...superfical it may be but may still be helpful to give u an insight so u know wat to expect and how we expect to be treated.

pls...without wanting to sound flippant...im not here to ask for opinions if i shld marry this guy...im juz trying to learn more abt the society, culture and traditions...and i reckon the best way would be to interact with the people themselves...