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  1. #1
    Anonymous is offline Registered User
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    If you're thinking to marry a man overseas read this first !!!

    Algerian men aren't to blame it's just arab men american men canadian men any kind of man you can think of they're all the same I'm sorry If that offends any men here but it's a simple truth. Any girls trying to put so much effort into marrying a man from another country and you are a visa holder so listen to my story first. I am an Arab American and I met this man 25 yrs old, living in Algeria (Constantine/settara area) on yahoo and we were joking for love back and forth for a couple of days until we started to know each other he was great he stopped smoking i kept in contact with his friends he let me talk to his mom and sisters on the phone everybody knew about me there and I thought hey he doesnt need anything from me he really loves me. When my dad said no to us meeting he started to cry on webcam and i felt wow somebody that hasnt seen me face to face just in cam and crying because it wont be possible to meet. We started talking and talking for 1 year 6 months and everything was great i knew him inside out and he knew me inside out he never had a gf or sexual intercourse and same with I. One time I tryed to leave him for his jokes about other women got to me and he tryed to kill himself and his friend called me crying. Well after couple of more months My dad said ok i will take u there to meet him. We visited Algeria beautiful country and beautiful people I love that country so much. His family were all angels and mom was awesome we got married after seeing each other for only 2 weeks face to face he said i swear to god divorce only happens if i die or you die and and my dad was happy we all were. He gave me a joke he will take 3 other wives I cried and ran away from his house in algeria everybody came to look for me and calm me down. So we got married i came back again to sign the marriage act to start the I 130 petition to bring my husband with me. In those 3 months he changed. His family changed. When I was in algeria second time I was alone looking to 4 walls everyday stay in one room and sisters come bring me food. My wedding day was a warning to my life I didnt see him in my wedding day or dance with him and he had fun with all his friends in this marriage day i was alone and his family told me to go to sleep leave the celebration to them. I was so hurt what kind of life had i fought God to give me. in those 3 months I was alone everyday he was in the cafe no work nothing just go drink coffee with friends give money to all who needed money buy food for the family take sisters shopping. He did take me to dine in restaurants here and there and took me to jijel. Only 10 times in those 3 months he took me out of house. When we went out house he brought somebody in his family we are newly wed have to have fun ALONE and he bring his aunt uncle and sister to beach with us and only talk with them i dont understand arabic and he said oh im sorry i forgot you are here and everybody start to laugh like its joke and i am alone to corner of the car. We went to get his visa to come to USA with me and he bring his sister and aunt to go shopping in Algiers and we go there for work not fun time. He give salaam to girl he dont know and this is haraam to give salaam and you dont know this opposite sex. His aunt touch him like she is his gf touch his chest and arms and hold him put her head on his shoulders. He dont stop anything what I dont like. He dress up like he is model outside all girls will see him and tell me dont look to other man or i will kill you. This is my life ladies and he told me to die and smack me many times he said i am dog i am black dog donkey he can find 10 girls like me i am not angel all this verbal and physical abuse. everything like this so be careful who you meet in net all is good halal man before marriage but after its up to you ladies please be careful ok! God bless and I am divorcing him and he will lose this visa to come to USA He dont get all what he wanted as he like with me.

  2. #2
    Bent_Bladi is offline Registered User
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    never EVER marry a man that doesn't have citizenship 100% of the time he'll treat you like crap and use you just for the green card.

    your story is very familiar to me. I've heard it countless times from different people. when it comes to marriage - feelings of love alone aren't enough. you have to dig deep and investigate what his personality is like. what his views are on certain things. mention EXTREMELY controversial topics and see how he reacts. tell him you've had lots of boyfriends in the past (even if u haven't) and see how violently he reacts. Men are liars - i'd have been suspicious when he pulled that "crying" stunt. and be convinced that he's not the one after the "suicide attempt". If some guy who has never seen you face to face will commit suicide for you then either he is dangerously obsessed (in which case you should run in the opposite direction) or he is trying to play with your mind.

    It's a good thing that you're divorcing him - some people, sadly, think that maybe he'll change or blah blah blah... anyways - divorcing him and taking away his chance for a VISA is the best revenge ... laugh maniacally if you want to - zbaleh (trash) like that don't deserve that luxury.

    Good Luck


    NEVER grow up
    Al Imran 147 - BE OPTIMISTIC!!
    your ≠ you’re

  3. #3
    Cheba_Mami is offline Registered User
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    Feb 2004
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    shameful he did that! you could not know, he was a good devilish actor. And that family, shame on them.
    You are an arab american, your culture is not that much different from the algerian. I am very sorry for you that happened, but be strong and find a quick way out. They have no respect for people, they adore money and chances to go to rich countries. Shame on them.

    May God guide you.

  4. #4
    Ruks is offline Moderator
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    Dec 2003
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    putting the 'meeting over the internet' aside, i have to say that here in the UK, i've seen quite a few marriages (non-arabs), which has involved one party from here and another from outside and their marriages are just great - they treat each other with respect and just get on with it. i think if you are clear at the beginning of the introduction about the person's circumstances and decide too go ahead, it can work out 9besides family is always involved and stuff and backgrounds can be checked).

    However, i also know many stories, again here in the UK, in which mainly english women have married arab men (yes algerians included) and once the man has got his papers, he has divorced her or left her and goes back home to get another bride. although there are many english women who are happliy married to algerian men too.

    i have to agree BB - love isn't the only reason to get married.

  5. #5
    Anonymous is offline Registered User
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    thank you gals for being supportive women divorce is never easy for any woman any age.Godbless all

  6. #6
    Anonymous is offline Registered User
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    he does call me everyday and text message he will change but i am strong woman not to lower my standards

  7. #7
    nesreen is offline Registered User
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    Anonymous

    So sorry to read your story . you went through a lot . im sorry you met the wrong guy an opportunist who used you . It is his loss . he does not deserve you . leave him without hesitation , if he treats like this smacks you and insults you , he is an abusive man and he does not deserve to be given a second chance . such a loser . I wish you could stop all the proceedings and go through a lawyer and stop his papers and prove you were used . it would be your vengeance , if i were you i would do it .
    im shocked by his familiy behaviour , ok , so he was an opportunist, his family too ? DOnt ever think many Algerians are like that . many would love of course to live elsewhere and have a decent life , but there are good Algerian men who appreciate love and appreciate a nice woman . i have seen people around me in algeria and i know what im talking about . I wish you all the best i hope you meet true love soon to end this nightmare you went through .
    Friendship

    [60:8] GOD does not enjoin you from befriending those who do not fight you because of religion, and do not evict you from your homes. You may befriend them and be equitable towards them. GOD loves the equitable.

    [60:9] GOD enjoins you only from befriending those who fight you because of religion, evict you from your homes, and band together with others to banish you. You shall not befriend them. Those who befriend them are the transgressors

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