Long distance?

[Muslimah23]

salam all

I went to Algeria for 3 weeks in August with my husband. However, I came back to London without him as he had to stay there to apply for his settelement visa. Its' been 5 weeks since i've been back and i'm finding it a little difficult being apart from him. We speak regularly over the phone but for some reason it's not enough for me. I'm really beginning to feel the distance and don't know how to overcome it. I'm also starting to feel alittle insecure and paranoid.

I really don't know how to maintain my marriage when we are so far apart. does anyone have any tips and advice? I have no idea when he will be back, perharps after a few months.

thank you

[elho]

Hi, it's not easy so feasible. just thank to god and him and your love. try this forum for algerian women, Forum de la femme algerienne :: Discussions entre femmes d'Algérie et de partout

good luck

[Felicity]

try using skype since you can speak for hours that way, and get to see each other, also email and text, because its nice to know that in your hearts you are always with each other, rather than just an allocated amount of time on the phone due to cost etc. Also, continue to act impeccably, and you will know that he is acting the same way too, so there is no need to feel insecure, as your common goal (to be together) keeps you close even when you are apart.

Lastly, my own tip, put alot of time and effort in at work, increasing your job security whilst he's not here, so that you are
1) tiring yourself out (less time home without him)
2) doing things for him and for when you will eventually be together

[Muslimah23]

Thank you for your advice. I just hope he gets to come to London very soon inshallah. I don't know if Ramadan slowed down the visa application process

[Felicity]

i would have thought that very unlikely since its British people/ company dealing with it, not Algerian. More likely because it is summer it is slower, since everyone gets married in the summer, it means that everyone applies for a spousal visa in the summer/at the end of summer.

[Mahdiyyah]

Dear Muslimah 23,
Felicity is right. All visa applications increase in the Summer due to holidays / start of University courses in September etc etc and there has been a huge backlog in the UK embassy ever since their move from Tunisia. The entry clearance officer I spoke with said that she had 700 applications on her desk in April this year! However, you're also probably right, as although the company is not directly Algerian, a majority of the employees are and so are any companies with whom they have to verify details. Therefore inevitably, during Ramadan, things do slow down.

My husband and I spent 2 years apart and again, I would agree with Felicity that I would have gone crazy without the msn and my work. My husband and I spent hours playing cards nearly every night!!! I could show him what I'd cooked and bought but most of all I could see his face, his sincerity and his smile and I know that's what kept me going.
It isn't easy but if you love him, it's worth it! We have been living in Algiers together for 18 months now and the wait was certainly worth it.

I hope that your wait is not a long one but that if it is, you and your husband gain the strength you need to see it through.

[Muslimah23]

Mahdiyyah, how come your application took 2years?!! I dont think i could survive that long! I would probably move to Algeria but then that would mean I would have to give up my work thus affecting my application!

It's so difficult getting hold of someone from the embassy. They don't provide any information at all.