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  1. #1
    nlexy is offline Registered User
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    Sep 2013
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    Red face Another Query - Meeting an Algerian

    Hi All,

    I've gone back and forth to this site over and over again trying to gauge different perspectives and opinions and also trying to find answers or just plainly looking for information.

    I'm in that situation; met a guy online -questioning the authenticity of things.

    I met this Algerian guy through a site. He was polite which can be a breath of fresh air so we started talking via Skype. We're actually in the 'friends' heading to 'more than friends' stage now. It's probably going to be four months now since we met and are talking - when I say talking, it's chatting and occasionally we webcam but its not that often. I can't say I am in love, but of course I have developed a liking to him. He is religious, we have common ground and we get along well. Recently, we've exchanged phone numbers but never have texted or called each other - though calling each other is quite expensive. He has started to say he missed me when I haven't been online, but I have been putting that down to missing our chats.

    I guess what I am trying to understand here is a few things:

    - He lives in Tebessa; I have tried googling Tebessa and can only bring up information on it's history. I want to know what type of living conditions there are there and what life is like there. More out of general curiosity because initially, I thought Algeria was in the Middle East! From our talks, it appears Algiers is far from Tebessa as Algiers, as I have read seems to be a city that is more open. He tells me that there are no entertainment places there, women are safe except if a man talks to woman and her family sees (then there is trouble) etc.

    - I live in Australia; Is anyone on this forum able to shed light on handling a long distance relationship and evolving into marriage which then means bringing the person into your country; is this difficult visa wise etc

    - I was born a Muslim; Religion is not the biggest gap here - we practice the same relgion but what are Algerian Muslims like? Strict? Not so strict? In between?

    - Online Relationship; As much as there are horror stories, I know there are success stories. Even though he and I are not dating or have exclusively moved to that area, I wonder about the authenticity. I am looking for someone serious and I am looking for an Imam in my life, but I don't, obviously, want to fall prey to 'visa hunters'. We've had the chat about visa hunters and though he says he'd rather be single than trapped in a marriage just so he can obtain a visa, I still wonder.

    Overall, he doesn't complain about life being financially tough etc - he has a job and a degree. He seems open minded and well educated. He is dark some days and moody some days - but I am as well and he has opened up about things I feel can be quite embarrassing for him as a man...as a Muslim man...the only downside is (for me really) he has this routine of finishing work, heading to the gym and hanging with friends then chatting to me late at night and its morning for me (I'm probably just being a typical girl about this issue here as we are not really an item!).

    So, at the end of the day, if we end up as friends, I think it will be fine but if it eventuates to more, I want to know what I am facing and if what I am facing is real and not just for a paper status.

    Thanks!

  2. #2
    BeeMyBaby is offline Registered User
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    Jun 2008
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    UK
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    Hi Nlexy,
    Tebessa - try looking it up on youtube, I just had a look and there are alot of videos of the village - it looks quite nice comparatively speaking! Although obviously its in the desert so will be unbelievably hot, but as you're from Australia, you're probably used to it... the fact that there is a gym there that he can go to shows there is stuff to do there!

    I don't think anyone can comment on how strict a whole country is with regards to their religion - they have to take Islamic studies in school, you hear the call for prayer virtually wherever you are, but still no one can comment on how religious they are. In the villages women are perhaps less likely to wear the hijab, unlike parts of Algiers where every woman wears a hijab.

    I believe they have a good education system in Algeria in that there seems to be access to tertiary education (and its free) but many do not get jobs in their sector at the end which can be unfulfilling. But hey, the same applies to the UK and probably Australia.

    I also cannot comment on the visa hunter query, use your judgement and keep your eyes wide open. Sensible things like looking to see if he is your age, suggesting you move to Algeria rather than he move to Australia and gauge his reaction etc.

  3. #3
    shakila is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
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    18
    BeeMyBaby makes some good points.

    Has your relationship progressed? I hope you are well and happy.

  4. #4
    alexixx is offline Registered User
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    Apr 2014
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    10
    Nice story and worth to read, Thanks

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