love marriage

[fieredetre]

hey im new herre, and im 100% algerian seriously i would go for love marriage i mean think about it do u want to spend the rest of ur life with someone u know and love or a stranger that u could grow to hate or maybe maybe if u lucky u would love
im not gonna take any chances

So tell me why would you want LOVE in your LIFE?

[Edited by fieredetre on 6th June 2005 at 10:00]

[Sweet_Pea]

Originally posted by fieredetre


So tell me why would you want LOVE in your LIFE?

[Edited by fieredetre on 6th June 2005 at 10:00]

Hello Fieredetre, welcome aboard

Here's my thought on your question - because we're incredibly immature and cannot handle the thought of being responsible for our own happiness So, we place it in someone elses hands so when we're miserable we have someone to blame it on without having to accept any responsibility whatsoever

Just my two cents

[flyinghorse]

Originally posted by Sweet_Pea

Originally posted by fieredetre


So tell me why would you want LOVE in your LIFE?

[Edited by fieredetre on 6th June 2005 at 10:00]

Hello Fieredetre, welcome aboard

Here's my thought on your question - because we're incredibly immature and cannot handle the thought of being responsible for our own happiness So, we place it in someone elses hands so when we're miserable we have someone to blame it on without having to accept any responsibility whatsoever

Just my two cents

Pretty good answer Sweet Pea, and even when we don't blame others for a broken, arrangend marriage, then at least we don't have to blame ourself I know good and happy arranged marriage, but also some which ended up in misery. But for me the point is the responsibility.
I want to be responsable for my happy days and for my unhappy ones !! This is the way we learn our lessons in this life. But anyway, frankly i never could imagine to spend from one day to the other my nights and my days with a guy i don't know closer. This is the most embarrassing thing i can imagine ! You don't have to have sex before your marriage, but you have to spend a lot of time with the person you wanna spend the rest of your life with. You need the chance to talk to each other in PRIVATE, without family members around you. You have to excange opinions in all kind of life aspects, also concerning intim subjects, love and sex. You need to feel free and save with your future spouse and all this comes only with time, you need months to know somebody closer - just my opinion.

[Sweet_Pea]

errrrr, umm, that was my opinion of love

my parents had an arranged marraige (and most of my aunts and uncles) and they are still happily married Maybe the parents knew something that we don't know

[HOUDA-K]

Yes, but people change during marriage. And not always for the good either.

So what does it matter whether it's love or arranged ?

[Sweet_Pea]

I think it matters because in the cultures where marraiges are arranges, they are not so easy to end.

Also, in the case of my family, pretty much everyone had kids immediately after they were married, so, instead of walking away at any little issue they worked them out - because the option was to go back to my grandparents home.

[HOUDA-K]

Salam ~Jelbana ~

I suppose what I'm trying to say is that, you can never really know a person inside and out before marriage whether it's love or arranged.

Does that make sense ?