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  • Algerian men

    I am married to an algerian man, we have been together for over 3 years. i have been to algeria twice to visit his family . most recently my husband has said he is going for maybe 10 days and does not want me to go with him, i am hurting very much inside. is anyone else going through the same thing.

  • #2
    oh my dear, i can imagine how you feel. that is no good news.
    did you asked him, WHY? did he explained?

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    • #3
      Try not to worry too much. algerian men love their freedom so this is probably just a way to have a trip by himself and plus its only for 10 days they will fly by!!
      Maybe you can compromise and ask him to book you a nice weekend away when he gets back

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      • #4
        It is now 14 days he is going. I feel as though i don,t fit in with his family , when i asked him why he wanted to go by himself he just said he wanted to spend time with his friends & family. that hurt a real lot. i have cryed so much i have no more tears inside. It would be so nice to hear from other people who have gone through similar, you can also email me through this site.

        thank you for your replies.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by rina1602 View Post
          oh my dear, i can imagine how you feel. that is no good news.
          did you asked him, WHY? did he explained?
          when i asked him he said he wanted to spend time with his freinds & family. it hurts a lot . i am his wife & never thought he would go back by himself as he promised me last year when he came back by him self he would not go again by himself.

          If you wish, you can email me through this site.

          thank you

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          • #6
            i see. sounds not easy. but can you speak with him about anything. or is it hard to communicate ...?

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            • #7
              I have been through a similar situation. Mine told me he was going for a few weeks and then it turned into a few months. He really took the mick and i was so upset with him when he came back. I know the times that i have been he gets fed up having to translate every conversation all the time. Algerian men are selfish when it comes to things like that. I have learnt the hard way. have u asked him if he went to for 2 weeks then maybe you could go for the 2nd week.?

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              • #8
                No as he wants to go by himself. Are you still in a happy marriage. Why did your husband go for a few months. I would not be able to cope. poor you. What was his excuse when he came back

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by rina1602 View Post
                  i see. sounds not easy. but can you speak with him about anything. or is it hard to communicate ...?
                  yes i can speak to him about everything . I find the lanuage barrier gets in the way

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                  • #10
                    no its not a happy marriage but after reading a few of the forums its seems that a lot of algerian men have problems communicating, and showing their feelings. I have faith in god that he will change from this behaviour but i dont know......... as for how i coped - i dont know but i just threw myself into my job and seeing friends while he was away. I even went on holiday myself lol. He didnt have an excuse when he came back but he has found it difficult to find a job and the fact that i work hurts a man's pride a lot so it was a mean to escape for him. Do u have a happy marriage?

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                    • #11
                      Yes i have a happy marriage apart from the hurt i am feelings right now. He has just booked & now he is going for 15 days. i feel he is ashamed of me or i have done something wrong or part of his family don,t like me as i noticed a difference last year from the first time i went. there was not that warmly feeling there . hope you understand what i am trying to say. I asked my husband if i could go for the 2nd week but i got the message from his tone of voice that i was not welcome.
                      He knows he is hurting me & has nearly caused us to split but he still is going. what a mess and heart ache. i feel i am loosing trust as he promised me last year he would not go by himself again. and sadly broken the promise. so i know a promise does not mean anything to him so that hurts a lot too.

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                      • #12
                        Okay in that case you need to ask him if there is something in the family which would not make you welcome. Ask him to be honest and you will not hold it against him. It could be something and nothing. But by the sounds of it there may be some kind of family rift going on and he just wants to spare you feelings. Algerian men are very stubborn and they will do what they no matter what the consequences - believe me i know. Let him go for the 15 days and ask him to contact you regularly for your peace of mind. As for them to keep a promise im sorry promises just dont exist in their world. Please dont take offence but are you the same religion? Feel free to send me a private message if you like

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                        • #13
                          No i am british & white. . i converted to muslim after we married. He says his family accept me of who i am, it is very rare i talk to them has he just about always talks to them when i am not around. Ihave the lanuage barrier that gets in the way as i can only talk a few words. hard. there is so much inside me that i dont want to talk to him whilst he is away so it will give him time to think about our marriage .

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                          • #14
                            i have a language barrier with my inlaws so sometimes it is a problem for me when i visit and i know algerian men just dont have any patience. Im sure everything will be okay. sometimes time apart can be good for a marriage. It makes them realise how good they actually have it. Inshallah everything will be okay for you

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                            • #15
                              yes i know you are probebly right there. time apart, i hope he apreciates our marriage whilst he is away. how you do you comunicate with your inlaws

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